Don’t be afraid of the big bad drag, She’s brassy, She’s blunt, She’s frankly a bit of a c*%t but She’s finally here to try and help you guys and gals sort out your problems. Introducing the one and only Glitz Von Winkle as GW’s ‘Dragony Aunt’

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I have a transsexual friend and we have been friends for quite a while but recently she has started to stick her nose into all my business and constantly causing trouble for me. Does it count as hate crime if I give her a slap??

Glitz says “Well as you all know I’ve always been a very good girl and I don’t condone violence. Just quite simple tell her well to get off. Everyone’s prone to gossip these days but some people take it too far. Just have a word with her. Then if that don’t work give her a slap lol!”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I came out as gay when I was 15 so since them I’ve been sleeping with men and been in a relationship for the last 2 years. But recently I met a girl and one thing led to another and we have been sleeping together for the last 2 months, and now I’m falling in love with her. But I’m still in love with my boyfriend – Can I have a relationship with 2 different sexes?

Glitz says “That’s simple!  which will be better for you in the long run. Where do you see it going? And most importantly which ones the better shag? Just try not to hurt anybody on the way.”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I’ve just watched the film “milk” and it made me think. I was never taught about anything LGBT in school. We had basic sex education but nothing was mentioned about homosexual relationships what so ever. I came out during school and having help and support would have saved me going through so much stress, or just having someone to speak to. So I was just wondering do you know of anyone else who got taught about LGBT people during school?

Glitz says “Very good film and very good question. I know, I sure as hell didn’t. Not a word during school. The only gay terms I heard at school was people shouting “faggot” and “Queer” at me down the corridors. I have never heard of anyone being taught about it in school, but your right it should definitely be involved with sex education. See I was lucky as I joined the Fruitbowl in Wakefield and grew up from there; but some people are not as lucky to have access to this kind of stuff. You’ve kind of hit a nerve here with me love. I think I might have to do something about this !!

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I’ve been with my girlfriend now for about 3 years and we are very happy apart from when we have sex. Well to be honest we don’t anymore. When we first got together we were at it like rabbits;  but now when we come home and get cuddled up she shuns me away and occasionally I have come home to find her playing with herself. I’ve found new toys laying around the house so seems to be more into herself than me. What should I do?

Glitz says “Well for a start maybe you should find a way to put the spark back into the relationship. Don’t just leave it all based around sex, however good the sex used to be. Maybe she’s an old romantic who wants to be wined and dined before putting out. I usually find when I get bored of sex I like to get the blindfolds out and make things a little more kinky and seductive. If all else fails just both of you get smashed, I always find people are up for sex after a few bevvies.”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I’ve met a guy recently. We have been seeing each other for about 4-5 weeks now and he’s funny and a nice guy to be with. There is just one problem. When we have sex he can’t make me orgasm. Unfortunately for him he has a small willy and we have to change positions quite a few times for me to be able to enjoy it. I don’t know what I should do any ideas?

Glitz says “Unfortunatly for him? Unfortunate for you sweetie. I’ve learnt over the years if his tackles not up to scratch – chuck him! Whats the point in pushing a push bike when you could be riding a Harley? Catch my drift love?”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
A while ago I broke up with my boyfriend hoping we could still be friends as we had some projects going on together. He is only young and I was his first proper relationship lasting about 9 months, and when we first broke up everything was fine. Obviously we were both a little upset but thing were going smoothly. But now everything I do he seems to try and cause problems for me; such as sending my current partner nasty messages via facebook, or trying avoiding coming to the same places I do just because I’m there with my boyfriend. It’s starting to really grind on me as I hoped we could be friends. What should I do?

Glitz says “Want me to send the boys round? it’s sounds to me like he is still madly besotted with you and doesn’t want to see you happy unless it’s with him. I think your going to have to sever the bond between you and him. If hes going out of his way to annoy you and cause problems with your new fella then its about time you told his were to get off. There’s nothing worse than a bitter ex. ive seen it. i had to push my ex husband down a flight of stairs before he got the message haha.”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I have really bad luck with women, like terrible bad luck. Every time a find a nice girl that I like, it always seems to go down the pan royally. All my life girls have said to me they would rather be friends with me than date me. After a few people have said this you begin to think its yourself and it has majorly knocked me. I don’t even approach women when I’m out in clubs now for fear of being shot down. Is there any way you could help me?

Glitz says “Well as an experience woman myself all I can say is you shouldn’t have to change yourself to try to impress other people. Let them like you for being you not something they want you to be. The best way to win people over is being confident, forward and just plain being yourself.”

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I came out to my parents and all my friends as a lesbian about 2 years ago, but now I have no idea how I’m meant to tell them I want to have a sex change to become a man. Do you have any advice?

Glitz says “I’ve always been a strong believer in the “you either like it or lump it” rule. If you want to do something that is going to make you happy then do it. It doesn’t matter what other people think of you. It’s your own decision when and how to come out to them if you even want to. I have a couple of transgendered friends who are now living as women and they say telling people and getting started with the treatments if the most terrifying but the best decision they have every made in their lives. My advice to you is do what makes you happy! :-)

Dear Dragony Aunt,
I met up with my first love at a school reunion and we have been having sex ever since. We dated for a year when we were 17. He was my world but often chose to see his friends rather than me. I thought the relationship wasn’t going anywhere so I finished it and we went our separate ways. We are 37 now and both married. He recently got back in touch through Facebook. He joked about our sex lives when we were teenagers. After the school reunion he gave me letters I had written to him all those years ago. I was amazed he still had them. Things have not been good with my husband. He is obsessed with his hobbies and we don’t spend time together. My friends say they are surprised the marriage hasn’t already ended. Now my first love has come back into my life. Every few weeks we meet for coffee. One day we decided to have a tour down memory lane. All the old feelings came back as we drove past our homes, school and friends’ houses. He said he was devastated when I left him as he thought we would always be together. He told me that he’d been a mess. I had no idea. I told him how I had felt about him. He glanced at me and said I looked like I did all those years ago .Next time we met he was driving me home and said, “What are we doing?” He pulled over and kissed me. It was intense and it rocked my world. We both admitted the spark was still there and talk turned to sex and what we wanted to do with each other. When his wife went to stay with an old friend I went to his house. We did everything and it was fantastic, but he wouldn’t let me stay the night. He says he cannot leave his wife because of the financial hit.  I said in that case we should not stay in touch. He wants to go back to being buddies again – sex buddies.  He says having sex is something we both need to do, like unfinished business, and he would be angry if I took myself out of his life. My friends warn me I should not be seeing an old boyfriend. It is all bottled up inside me and I feel I have nowhere to go.

Glitz says “It sounds to me like he thought telling u about old feelings would have go him laid. Clearly all he wanted was a quick fumble with an old flame. Maybe it’s time to either chuck ya husband or put the effort in to rekindle it. Secret meeting are never a good thing. He’s not the answer for you, he’s a problem. If you are sure your marriage is empty start making changes in your life so that you will be free  to find someone who will value you and want to spend time with you. Watch out, though, that you don’t find yourself drawn to another man with the same tendency to take you for granted and ignore your needs once he feels he has a hold on you. Because we all know what those men are like!!!”

Please send your problem letters to hello@gaywakefield.com and our Aunty Glitz will get back to you with her *advice.

*Please note that advice given may not be the correct advice to be taken

Categories: Dragony Aunt

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